Cross cultural relationships - dealing with differences.
But can you actually develop a relationship without sharing a common language ? Jem and Inés have been together for a year and fell in love at first sight. If you are wondering if an intercultural relationship will work out or not, the (Not a love relationship, but an international friendship that faces the same issue.). 9 things to know about interracial relationships I wish we could be all kumbaya- we're-all-human-beings-love-is-love, but in this current.
When you're together Some things — perhaps even the most important things — can be communicated in other ways, like your body language and the tone of your voice. According to psychologist Dr John Gottman, author of The seven principles for making marriage work, how something is said is more important than what.
So face each other when you're talking. Pay more attention to non-verbal clues — body language, gestures, facial expressions. When your partner is talking, give him or her time to finish speaking without interrupting before replying — you could ask yourself: Or am I just waiting to speak?
Be patient It may take longer than usual to have a conversation, so be prepared! It seemed like we could never fully express ourselves. Stay chilled — don't take offence Bear in mind that different cultures have different ideas about what's taboo and what isn't, and also some cultures are more direct in their speech than others. So what might come across to you as hurtful or insensitive might not have been intended in that way at all.
So, it's better to ask your partner for clarification before getting upset — you might have misunderstood. Always ask If you don't really understand or are not sure about something your partner says, it can be tempting just to nod in agreement but say nothing and hope you've got it right.
It means you can venture beyond the basic level of conversation — and you can stop worrying all the time about not being understood. Keep a pocket-sized dictionary to hand or use an app on your table or smart phone. Very useful, especially if you're having an important conversation and you really want to make sure your partner understands exactly what you mean.
You may be an English person dating a non-native English speaker. Do not expect your partner to always understand you if you are not able to understand them in their native language.
Be patient and be understanding towards their learning curve in your native tongue and culture.
Intercultural Relationship: 7 Tips To Make It Work Like Magic
With time and proper guidance, your partner will be able to understand you better. Better still, you can always attend a language course in their native tongue. It is actually a great thing to know a foreign language. My partner gave the best answer by saying that we are both keen learners of cultures, which is absolutely true.
'Can Intercultural Relationships Work In The Long-Run?'
We become more tolerant with one another. If you are not a keen learner of other cultures, I assure you that this can be hard. You are bound to find things that are almost unacceptable in your culture or even unheard of.
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You and your partner both need to understand that there is no absolute right or wrong. These differences can simply be a clash of cultures.
Listen and avoid doing or saying things that are disrespectful. For example, you may say nasty things to each other in an argument but know when to draw the line. This simple method can help avoid unnecessary cultural clashes. This is useful for any relationships! That means my pronunciations may not always be on point. I have no issues understanding Americans or English people as I am exposed to their culture and slangs but I was never exposed to Kiwinglish.
So, I learned by reading an online Maori dictionary and did some research to understand what my partner was constantly speaking of. Nevertheless, he made the effort to simplify his language by removing his lingos. Our communication has improved so much thanks to these little efforts. However, these days we simply speak pigeon English broken English with each other.
It is fun especially when others look at us in confusion. Having our own language or sharing a mutual language that only we both understand is extremely important to maintain the fun side of things. Even small arguments sound better and cuter! Either one of us would always end up bursting into laughter and deal with the difference in opinion with an open heart.
I am a lucky person to meet my partner who loves culture as much as I do.
Intercultural Relationship: 7 Tips To Make It Work Like Magic
Thus, he has ample knowledge of the Chinese culture including understanding simple Mandarin. He has also put in more effort to study my culture and language. We make it a point to resolve issues by providing clear answers than to argue on the differences. Discussing and coming to a point of agreement as calm as possible is our main focus. Spend time speaking to each other and you will indefinitely find similarities that you both share.
I am sure that is how you both got attracted to each other in the beginning. These similarities can be sharing an interest in spicy food or desserts, massage, sports, and having the same taste in music or cinematography.
Focus on your similarities and share what you love with each other — educate one another and have intellectual exchanges. I have been a martial artist for the last 20 years and my partner has always been interested in martial arts but never had the chance to train any. He showed more interest and expresses his intention to train.
As a certified San Da coach, I was more than happy to coach him personally in kickboxing and Muay Thai. Since I trained Judo briefly, I taught him some basic moves too. We mess around with each other by fake sparring everywhere we go and that keeps us happy. We would also watch fights on YouTube together.
Thus, my partner explained to me about rugby and how it is played since he used to play rugby in school. My partner is knowledgeable in Western civilization and history. I love history but never learn much about Western history.Multicultural Couples Talk About Race, Marriage and Love - Love Without Borders S1 EP1 - BRIDES
He gives me insights on historical events that have happened in the Western world. Together, we learn and become more knowledgeable about the world day by day.
Cross-Cultural Romantic Relationships - Oxford Research Encyclopedia of Communication
You can argue that if your partner loves you, they will not make you compromise for them. To begin, compromises are totally doable, just as they are in every relationship. And while making those compromises isn't always easy, I've seen firsthand how much they're worth it. Lubna Somjeea clinical and health psychologist who specializes in intercultural relationships. According to her, the unique difficulties that come with intercultural relationships, most commonly disapproval from family "is likely to exacerbate any pre-existing relationship issues and can cause the relationship to break down.
Science teaches us that we all hold bias — it's what we do with that bias [that's] important. But if these outside obstacles factor into the internal relationship, it's easy to start doubting you and your partner's future. To work through these external issues, sit down with your partner to discuss the negotiable and non-negotiable aspects of each person's identity.
For example, if it's an interreligious relationship, would one person be willing to convert for the other? On the flipside, is one person willing to cut ties with a certain family member who is unaccepting of their partner? If not, how would you introduce them to your different backgrounds so they can choose however they'd like to self-identify?